Review Summary.

Thursday: FAC through a super amazing birthday celebration. Pamela gave me a tear-jerking speech. Everyone brought food, and they even kicked out people who aren't FAC or allowed to be there haha. Pamela's going to be a strong leader when she grows up, she's like a mini-me. Hahaha. Announced the new officers; Ronald&Kerlyn for Co-Ps, Charlene for Secretary, Pamela for Treasurer, and Angelo for VidProducer. That bday party was the first time anyone ever planned anything for me. Ahaha. Then went to Deveon's Grandma's house for the first time. Played games on iTouch, ate dinner, and taught Keith.

Friday: Spent whole day with Family in Seattle, went to the Symphony Orchestra (Dude! I want to learn how to play cello!), came home and went straight to cleaning the house and partied the rest of the night with my freaking amazing Tech Friends and KW Girls. Hahaha. Dude, we played Limbo, opened presents, said one thing people liked and didn't like about me, and ate food. Oh yeah and the Tale of Desperaux! Haha. Then parents canceled the me going to the beach to count down with Kuya but it's all good. But the worse part came right before midnight... Which is something else...

Saturday: Woke up feeling kinda sad because of that thing but it's all good. Because "___________" happened, screaming and arguing happened the whole morning and afternoon. Deveon came over to cheer me up and we hung out playing Monopoly the rest of the day until I left for church. WHOO, CHURCH!

Sunday: Church, church, Lauren, Saturation Drive, Binhi Mtg, BEAST VID!, Bday Party, Basketball Practice, Bday Party, Exhaustion.

Monday: Horrible day. No comment.

Tuesday: Great Day.

Wednesday: Great Day. Aced Kanji Test!

Thursday: I love FAC.

TODAY! Can't wait for the GEM!:D

Okie.

So I've just noticed that after I read any of my blog entries it doens't sound like me. How can I make the things I type out sound like what's going on in my head? I haven't been very thoughtful in Blogger. Dude, I need to start actually writing what's in my mind hahahaha.

So currently I'm working on Fisher's project. I actually like it because I'm finally researching thigns that are given to me in straightforward directions and feel like I'm learning. Plus my topic is perfect for what I want to look at; the Health Care Crisis!! Hahahaha.

My weekend was pretty okay.
Friday; Yugioh Tournie, Basketball Practice.
Saturday; Home, TalkW/Mum, Pedicure, Church.
Sunday; Church, Church, Bball Practice, FeelingSickatHome, VAJA.

I noticed this morning that I can't hold grudges... I'll get mad and frustrated for like 14 minutes straight and vent in my head or to someone, then completely get over it. Unless someone brings that painful event again and wants to talk about it, then that frustration builds again ahha. I'm like counting down to when school ends. I need to pick up my grades, dude! No joke. Haha. Gotta bring up Fisher's and Coble's then I got all A's and A-'s. Goodness gracious.


On a Personal Note:
GONNA BE the 1-6 this SATURDAY! WOOOOOOOTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!

Light In My Eyes Pt. 2.

My eyes have opened to something new. I went to my guidance counselor this morning when I thought all was lost. If if weren't for Mrs. Howlett, I would've broken down in the middle of Mr. Rush's classroom and wouldn't have been able to stop crying. Afterwards, I went to find an old friend, and felt so much as even ground and ease being around her and even him. Sighs. I need to talk to my Mum, and stop keeping things inside.



Haha, gotta get ready for the Scenic Hill Elementary Field Trip!:]

Hopefully I'll come in time for the League Meet.



W.W.H.A.P. T.H.E. O. W.I.T.T. W. A.

End of my 4th season in Track

It's finally done. I think we have a couple more practices, but today was my last meet. KM vs. KW and it was a really good meet actually. Haha. I got kind of last in my events but I made a PR on the race that I got last in so that should be a good sign that God's saying "Don't give up! You tried your hardest and that's all that matters." And He's right. Track is literally something I will keep on doing until High School ends. I don't care if I'm good at it, or the fasted or the best, I just love doing what I do. The hurdles makes me feel so great, the running gives me energy, and the training is a great way to use my time.

I'm excited for three things...

• My birthday: WOOT WOOT! Gonna have like three parties haha.
• End of Sophomore Year: DUDE! Gonna chill during summmeerrrr.
• Beginning of Junior Year: HOLY SNAPZ! I'm about to be an IB Diploma Candidate. Dude, this is probably one of the most exciting things I've ever made a decision to. I don't care how bad people down it, all those who haven't done the Diploma are the oens whoa re all "OOH, you're going to die!" and etc. Well you know what? I'm different, and I know for sure my class is different to. I'm not doing Diploma to get the college credit, or to be with my friends. I'm doing the Diploma for three reasons; closer to school so I won't be outcasted, going to be way more prepared for college, and the International Baccalaurrette (Sp?) program is the top of the top advanced learning you can take in High School and I've never let down an opportunity like this ever since I quit the Gifted Program (totally one of my only regrets). I can't wait for all the things I'm going to learn, the study groups I'm going to have, the funny anxious feeling of exams, and the excited feeling I'll get when I get my scores. I can do it.

I can do it.

That's Just The Way It Is.

There was a girl in a circle. She felt surrounded by people and smiled. From birth she was born to talk and born to love. And that's just the way she lived her life. In a moment of her childhood she felt lost, almost hated all things, and wanted to kill herself. Although others persuaded her, staff alerted her parents, they think they were the ones to tell her not to die. But God was the one to tell her not to die, and He told her he had another purpose. Her purpose was to live, affect others, perform good works, and to serve Him. If she did all of this, He would bless her and her family. So she did exactly this, to a fresh start on her teenaged year. In this year she still felt lost and turned to a boy. A boy that made her feel slightly different in a hazy red way. She saw a lost spectrum in his hazy red and told herself he would be one who could be here for her. Her sisters would fight, and dramatize one another which is something the girl didn't like but couldn't help but love her sisters. There was nothing she could do but try her best to keep them together; like white school glue. This boy soon became her almost everything but he couldn't give her what she thought she wanted the most; real commitment. His name for now will be the Unwilling. It ended and when it ended this deep slash was ripped in her heart and she felt like something was missing. There was only one other boy she liked while she with the other and we'll call him the Unseen.

After the Unwilling, she just went through boy after boy feeling like she was floating along the way. The several could not treat her well, and that was bad. Until the Unseen stepped into her life and it had to stay that way. The joy and pain was equaled throughout the neverending process of love and hate. The girl tried her hardest and no one could relate to her and she felt no one wanted to listen. Though in her life always, people needed her everywhere, from this place to the other. When someone said, "I'm so tired. Oh my gosh, life sucks." She would secretly whisper to her ownself, "Why say that you, fool? You are so lucky. You look better happier than moping around. Try and be me." Though the girl did things for others, scarcely was the favor returned. She continued on her quest that God had given her by always treating others the way she wanted to be treated, training herself to be the best leader she could be, and completing each task that was asked of her. When she thought her life was about to end, her life always started once again whether she liked it or not. Now the suicide problem became different, she can't die because she is nothing, the reason she can't die because she is of too much importance for others' lives. And her life continued

She change for everyone, it didn't seem like that but it is. She had to be a certain way for people to feel a certain feeling. She's always had her motives and reasons. The problem was she was too good at everything, to good at making people feel good and helping them with their successes. So many others owe her food, money, and clothing that it feels weird knowing that they make it a grand deal when she doens't return their food, money, and clothing. Good fights she's won, assignments she's conquered, missions that have proved to be well commissioned. But none of this made her feel that great if it wasn't for the glory of God or herself. But soon through life she couldn't tell what was for the Glory of God or herself. She confused herself in later teenage years that it was for others, for mothers, for fathers, for workers around her. The ring around her named Sanity weakened and when she told someone what was wrong, they'd respond robotically with "You'll be fine" or their own minor judgement. She despised negative criticism, but what can she do? There was no choice but to nod her head and take their advice. Those mothers and fathers were clueless of her actions, her decisions, her motives for life. They were too happy basking in the successes of the pressured child. The mothers nagged, the fathers pushed on, the advisors called and called, the playmates complained and muttered, and the workers whispered the words they would never say to the girl's face. Through this she could never forget her mind or heart.

She forced herself against every circumstance to deny her feelings for the Unseen. Then the day came where her mind created a gicantic black block around the Unseen in her head and heart, and it worked for days after that. Today's the day she realized that everyone always wanted her to hear them, to help them, to give them her attention. Today's the day she grew epiphany one after the other. But what can she do? Tell people? Tell who? Why should she complain and be sad if she has a good life? No one would want to understand. No one is willing to because they are concentrated on the natural fixated emotions they have against her and feelings they have of their own lives that they are just waiting. But that seems about right, because the girl realized today that that's just the way it is.

I've been thinking.

And I like what I'm thinking. :]