You know what?

I should be working on homework right now, but I'm not. So I've finally realized that I'm a doer not a sitter or a stander, but a doer. I do what I say I'll do, and keep my word. Why do people want things and not even try to get them? I have a friend who always makes bucket lists and funny goals she wants to do, but never has she ever convinced herself or made the time to do what she said she wanted to accomplish. I've finally convinced her that she should because duh life is short and life is beautiful so live it.



I spend almost everyday doing things for school, church, piano students, friends, and family, yet I still have time to make myself happy. Whether it's an unhealthy snack, or jumping on one food I always mange to be happy. Externally, I'm a really happy and positive person. Even internally, but deep deep down I'm probably a mess. I've realized that just not thinking about the bad stuff actually makes my life so much better and my mind stay super clear. Sometimes it's hard for me to stay optimistic and stay positive when something triggers my ill feelings, but I always somehow overcome it.



Right now I'm thinking to myself that I wish I had an instruction manual to my life because it's come to the point where I want to go in almost every door opened to me. But I can't. I've got to limit my e.c. for next year so I can focus on school and church more. Sighs. SENIOR YEAR IS NEXT YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Current Planned E.C.:

• Senior Class Prez


• Key Club Member


• Robotics Member


• NHS Vice President or Secretary


• Math Club Member
  
  

Other

• Adult Organist


• Binhi Officer


• Piano Teacher
  
  

I've actually had free time for myself more lately since exams are getting closer so less homework. I'm working up a schedule to study every single day at least for 20 minutes!:]

LoveLifeStatus: FML, why do I always feel unimportant?

Love.

It's all around us is what I think. In the eyes of my mother, the laugh of my dad, the walk in my brother's steps.

Today I was watching him, why is he so great? Although he doesn't do as much as I do (pointing the finger! haha), he tries his hardest. He's the most any young man could do for me, less than I hope for, but more than what I've expected from anyone. He's like a present wrapped in beautiful wrapping paper, and a shimmering bow on the top.

Today was one of the hardest days of my life. We'll call it MGM crisis.
How I responded: Screamed, yelled, acted on emotions.
How I should've responded: Locally I should've kept the embarassment away from my brother and dad. I should've not cried and instead responded in a calm mature way. Domestically I should've kept my tears in at service. I should've kept my math shut to Ka Gerard and smiled to keep my head up high.
Similar Situations: None.
My Opinion: I love her and I promise to pray to God to keep my strength that that'll never happen again. The MGM crisis lasted for 15 hours, and 45 minutes.

Half way done with my crisis project. I hate CWI. "Actually, just the teacher", says the student.

A Heart's Wish

To see things on the brighter side.

Day of Remembrance

I hit several realizations...

• Moment of Lucid Smiles; I served at the Annual Kiwanis Senior Breakfast 7am-10am today with the Key Clubbers. It was amazing. We set up all the tables and served the food. We even "performed" our Key Club cheer in front of all the seniors. I snuck out of the house this morning to go to this event because I forgot to tell my parents, and I didn't want to cancel on James E. Being scared out of my wits, my Mum called my at 9:30 screaming, screaming, screaming. Not because I left, but because I didn't wash the dishes. Interesting, right? Her exact words, "Why the hell did you forget to wash the d*** dishes? You care more about your devotiosn and promises to friends and school events verses your own family and house. Etc." Sighs. I shouldn't have shed any tears, but the truth in her words hurt emotionally.
  My thoughts; I'll keep that to myself.
• Moment of Athleticism; Had first basketball practice since a year ago. It felt great, but I confounded that it's just like Track, YOU NEED TO WORK GOOD FOR IT! Likewise, I think we had a rough beneficial start today. :D
  My thoughts; I'm anxious for the upcoming practices and the tournament itself.
• Moment of Boredom; Got home and took a nap for three hours. So woke up around 4:00. Took a shower and felt supremely bored. So I emailed a few teachers asking if I could do any extra research or be prepared for any upcoming assignments. And Fisher responded thank goodness haha. Worked on Reed's trigonometric derivations while watching TV for another three hours. AMAZING! Haha.
  My thoughts; I really want to get straight A's for this Semester. It's so close I could taste it. I just have 3 A-'s. They're all close to an A by like 1.4 off each A-. But the thing is I don't really care. Because I really just don't. My teachers are beginning to understand me that way. I told most of them all about it, except Coble and Roller. I love learning, that's why I've never really had straight A's because I didn't focus on the letter grade or percentage accuracy, but made sure that I whatever I turned in I knew exactly what I was turning in, and how I got to that way. I came with a recent realization last week that learning vs. the grade, I'd rather have the learning. The learning is more useful when I'm in college or the real world. I will of course explain that throughly to colleges when I meet the administrators.

Lately, all I can think about the future. Boeing gave me a secret way to keep myself organized. It's called the WIP/OnDeck/Hold List procedure. Haha. I'll explain that later on. I'm still not sure what I want to be when I grow up. I have the whole marriage, kids, time management thing already figured out. But the occupation is the only thing screwing up my plans because I'm still not sure what I want to be. And I'm scared. SO scared that I won't be able to figure it out all in time. I want to do something where I can make a mark on either history or be remembered somehwere.

Have you ever been with someone where you weren't with them? This can be defined in two ways. Where two people are together but netiher one of them know that each other's presence is present, or only one person knows of the other person's present. The second one is where the two people have a bond with one another but do not announce a title of the present attraction. This both has to do with presence and non-presence.
i.e. You are reading this blog right now, and I could be reading it too. Interesting, right?

Another matter of subject; the meaning of words. Why do people always say things, promise things, tell you things that they don't even keep to word? If they really wanted wanted to mean what they say, why don't they just do it? Instead of waiting around for others to tell them what they're doing right or wrong. Sighs. I've come across this circumstance many times in my life, and several times this week. Why do you promise me something and then either you break it or not fulfill it!?!?!? You make me wants to cry, obviously though... You already have that sense. You mean so much to me, why would I lie and not mean what I say?

I feel normal again. Haha. After my day of relaxation and boredom. Ahaha. Well on the phone with Deveon, blog another day.

WOOT WOOT!

WE DID IT! MUAH! YESH! FINALLY DONE! WE'RE SO BAWB!

Tonight was Kent-Meridian Technology Academy's Multicultural Night and it was a hit. I was Performance Manager, Cue Director, Balut Eating Contest Mike, and part of the F.A.C. performance. It was amazing. I invited the beautiful Mara and satisfied Trek's needs. Haha. I've missed Mara so much, oh my goodness!!! I'm so glad I got to see her today and surprise peeps. WOOT WOOT! Even though I wasn't able to hang out, I was glad to a part of an event that put smiles and laughs on people's faces

My Favorite Parts:

-When I realized how much I was needed. I'm not overexagerating or anything, but I was called almost everywhere. WOOT WOOT x2!
-Buying the fans; Tanvir agreed to helping me find fans. Dang Cheska told me we'd have them! But it's okay, I talked to her about it. Even though it didn't seem like she was in control, she was just as stressed out as all of us were. Tanvir and I went to Party City, Target, Top Foods, Ross, Jhoann's, and finally Dollar Tree. They all didn't have anything except DOLLAR TREE! I'm so going to go there for everything from now on. Haha.
-Seeing Sandra on stage with her Koreans peoplez, I LOVE HER!!!!! It was super cute with Cindy doing swords, cartwheels, and you know. Haha.
-TINIKLING/CARINOSA performance. Even if I was scared, it happened, and it went very well. I was super happy. We got volunteers like Rykiel, Toby, Lisa M, and MR'HARTLEY! YESH! That part was funny. Haha.
-Balut Eating Contest; Camillo won for the students, Mrs. Drake won for the adults! WOOT!
-Seeing his face in the crowd. :] Worth it.
-Seeing my parents on the side. :D Even more worth it.
-Exhilaration that it was finally over and everyone congratulating me and saying I did a good job. WOOT WOOT x3! Hahahaha.

Track Season starts next Monday. Am I pumped? That's a check to the yesh.

Shout out to Mr. Hartley!:]

Potroast.

-Moist cuts of meat.
-Add vegetables right at the beginning.
-Brown the meat first on all sides which improve the flavor and appearance of the meat. High heat used during browning carmelizes the sugars and proteins in the meat, giving a rich flavor.
-Just wait and voila!
-For cooking liquid, you can use anything from coca-cola to beef broth or tomato juice.
-An hour and the meat is done.

When The World Stops.

Selflessness; to think about other's needs above your own.

I want to be more selfish, I think. Like talk more about myself, grow an ego in plain words. I'm not sure how to get there though... Sighs. But see, it depends! With girls, I'd rather talk about them because well they're girls, and girls like talking about themselves. I feel like if I talked about myself though, they'll just judge, space out on it, or wish they could talk about themself. If it's converasting wtih boys, they don't even really care because thye do care. I can't really explain it haha. I asked Deveon about and he said "Boys were just raised to not really give a shiz." Hahaha.

I'm going to try and be more open. But are you willing to pay attention, my friend?
BWAHAHAHAHA!

( . )( . )

Heroes of the day: Emmalyn L., Natrice L., and my orginial Alison B.

Yesterday was the last school day of 2009.
At around 7:30 I surprised Natrice and Emmalyn with Alison and I. We took pics, caught up with one another, talked about a specific brother, love lives, family, Arizona, all kinds of junk hahahaha. We waited the longest time for Nat's mum to wake up and be ready. We ended up eating at Applebee's and having an okay time. Unfortunately, I told Alison about a very disturbing subject which killed her insides and I feel totally horrible about because I should've told her later because she became super upset.=[ She soon got over though during dinner, then we went to Wallgreens to get ice cream which we didn't even eat. We laid in bed at home and talked, then fell asleep on Emmalyn around 1:30a.m.9(so early!!!).
We woke up around 9a.m. and made breakfst; sausages, bigger sausages, bacon, eggs, and pancakes. Just when we finished food, Emmalyn had to leave. After Nat, Als, and I ate, we went down to the Marina and picked at crabs, shrimp, and rocks. WOOT WOOT! Kuya Teddy was our hero for driving us haha. Then we talked for awhile, watched videos, cooked more sausage, Als fell asleep for a bit, Nat's Mum came home, and then we headed on down to Bellevue Square to go ice skating and hang. THAT WAS SUPER FUN! So many inside jokes and awkward moments, too lazy to write hahaha. The way home was quite sad. Mariah Carey started playing and some sad songs reminded me and probably the other two girls about weird stuff. Listening to those songs, and watching buildings pass by me in the night on the way home created a door in my head where I finally made a decision...

Anyways.

Things I Want To Do With Him:
-Go ice skating, push him down.
-Go to Bellevue Square Mall, make him buy me ONLY Godiva chocolate.
-Go to a rocky beach, put a crab down in his hood.

Gniteeeeeeee. Let the stars shine brgiht tonight.

Tomorrow.

I will wake up!
I will do some pushups to get the blood flowing!
I will open my eyes and force a smile!
I will eat breakfast that my Mum made!
I will practice my organ!
I will pray!
I will leave at 7:40 a.m.!
I will arrive and greet the chapel!
I will change into my uniform!
I will pray!
I will prosper!
I will reassure myself with the talent, skill, and faith that God has given me!

AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHS!
Not nervous, just alittle scared and ready to overcome what I've been fighting.
Everything will be different after this weekend, or the same.
I will pray.

Freaking Riztarded.

Unbelievable. We pulled in the parking lot, and they pressed the button which clicked the camera which flashed.

If only, if only.
If only I wasn't sick today and went to school.
If only I took better care of my body and myself in general before worrying about everyone else's sakes.
If only I woke up earlier and called Emerson earlier.
If only the 10 o clock block wasn't my phone and I would've gotten Jayson's text msg.
If only my dad didn't brush his teeth, change his clothes, check if the house if secure, saved his time without yelling at me for about 5 minutes on how I'm rushing him and am irresponsible for not having anyone remind me earlier.
If only I wasn't me.

Cookies'n'Cream!<:]

I need to relax more... I'm always having the want to cry or hide in a hole. Today I broke down and vented to Jayson D.C.... I didn't mean to, but just at that moment in front of him, I couldn't help it. I need to do soemthing to help myself... I don't care about anything that ahs to do with me. I don't care about the well being of my body or the levels of tiredness, sickness, or illness that affects my body. Lately, I've been getting these chest pains that last 3-4 hours for the past 4 days. Today during 5th period Drake's English class I went to the front of the room to get a highlighter and then my head started throbbing. I gripped the counter next to the bin of highlighters. I thought the throbbing was gone a few seconds later but before I know it I took a deep breath in and AUGHS! The right side of my chest was constricting and I couldn't breath. I slid downwards on the counter and everyone started looking at me. Drake let me run to the bathroom where I had to catch my breath. Sighs. THat lasted for 3 1/2 hours. Sighs. You'd think that I couldn't go through with 3 1/2 hours but it only hurts the moment in the first hour. For the rest of the day I tried my hardest not stress myself out or do anything rigorous. When I got to the carousel around 5:30, I felt much better. But then my Mom had to call me and ruin it all. She was yelling at me that I shouldn't have came to the carousel and should've stayed home. Her exact words, "Your main priority right now should be to get better so you'll be healthy for playing at the Children's Thanksgiving, marching the Adult Processional, and just taking care of your own body. You never take care of yourself because you're too busy running around worrying about other people's problems and being there for others. People don't even care that they stress you out so what's your problem? What makes you think you could go to the carousel when you're sick and etc, etc..." And on she went from there. Sighs. It's whatever. So what if I'm sick? I'm at the carousel to be there as President. If I hate it when people don't show up for what they said they wuold be there for or whatever, what kind of example would I be if I don't show up myself? It's time to chill. I'm going to watch anime, eat chocolate, then eat the Portobella Mushroom pizza that Mum made. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

People who made my day:
Travis Tran, Joanna Wu, and Mr. Wade Barringer. Thank you.

Filipino American Club.

I could that as of today I really saw my club's strengths. I'm so proud of them that I just want to buy all of them candy and desserts haha. Today we had a productive practice led by my stressful love, dear Alison, and then tickets led by me, and just us all working together in ways we mysteriously don't really know. I'm way up for the upcoming Carousel event. We've been planning this thing for about 2 1/2 months now. Tickets be on sell starting on Monday. WOWZAS! This is realy going to happen. I can't believe it. I never thought that the club would reach this high enough potential.

Although I'm very proud and probably could brag for the first time in my life that the club is better than YOURS, haha, we could still do better. Ally, Sandra, Jayson, and I could tell who are the active members. We're building it up and I just can't wait for the rest of the year.

For the carousel, we're reading to kids, dancing the Tinikling, operating the carousel, having a great time, helping out Santa, helping out Rainbow Girls and KW National Honors Society, and just making memories. I'm so proud of the club.
Always reach for your dreams. Never let yourself look down. :D

GO TO MORFORD FAMILY CAROUSEL, DOWNTOWN KENT! Opening Day; November 27th, Friday. Woot woot!

Deposittttttttt.

Dude, I feel so great that I was able to deposit money in the bank today. After school, when I finished my project for Transier's, Dad let me go to the bank. Sandra went with my inside and I felt so proud to deposit 80 dollars. Haha. I know that's not that much or it might sound a lot but at least it was something. I need to start saving money up. Mum says I got to buy my own car and that's where all this money is heading. Haha. AUGHS!

Right now as I'm waiting for one of my piano students to show up, I'm thinking why did I take this job of teaching piano? I mean it has it's ups and many downs.
Downs: Less time, packed schedule, finding all kinds of curriculum to teach, stress of planning recitals, and no passion for the money.
Ups: Passion of teaching, brightening the child's mind, growing their creativity levels, the sound of music, hopefully they follow their dream in music which I messed up my dream.

Haha well there's that. I'm not sure if piano teacher's going to be my only job for high school because that's what I'm thinking. I've only had one recital but the recital paid off so much work of teaching the kids.
Next Recital; December 12th, 2009th; Fine.

EXCITED.


I wish it was this formal. BWAHAHAHAHA.

Postings.

I just overlooked all my entries this year compared to last school year, and last year I was more in depth with what I was going through and what was in "my mind". Why is that? DANG, last year I was hecka stressed out. I still am right now, but I now know how to handle it other than the last years of my life. I've started about 4 entries in the last 2 days but wasn't able to finish them or have the courage to post them up. Now, I will express what's in my head.

Last Thursday, my Mother and I got in an argument in whether I should be in IB or do Running Start. I have nothing against any of the two programs, but I really don't know what to pick. IB provides a huge beneficial learning experience for me and is basically Tech Academy but on paper. Right now I have one IB class which is Pre-Calc/Trig, which is apparently a college class says Mrs.Reed. I had a C at the time of last thursday and my mother was going BALLISTIC. Being all "You really think you could handle a 6-period IB diploma crap when you can barely B+ your way through ONE IB class? How do you expect to succeed in life? How do you expect to succeed in anything when you overwhelm yourself with too many priorities and meet too much people? and etc."
I see where she's going at but goodness, making me feel bad about myself isn't going to help me, it's going to make me feel like I"m a complete failure. Geez, encourage me instead. I really want to get the IB diploma. Why?
-It's challenging.
-Highest level of education by far in HS.
-Prove to my parents that I could do this.
-Won't have to drive and have car insurance and blahz.
-Be able to still have a HS experience.

My Mum and Dad planned out everything for me already though.
Maria Nikki Molina will get her Associates Degree in 2 year running start for nurse at Highline CC. Then after graduating will be working as a nurse somewhere while attending school at UW for three years to be a physician's assistant.

Wow. All I can say. Like I had a say in it. How can they tell me for the first 15 years of my life that I have to be the best, that I have to reach for the top, put my 150% in everything, never give up, don't quit if my life depended on it! And then sink me down to lower standards. No offense to everyone. It makes me feel like I need to lower my standards on everything that I"m doing and it pisses me off. Why do they think they run my life when they don't even have an idea of who what I do? That's why I inform them on everything that I'm doing, who I'm talking to, where I'm going. I love knowing that my parents know. I think that a lot of kids come to an age where they wish for their parents' attention more than from anyone else. I am at that point because I'm growing up. I can't even list the many differences in myself than myself from last year. I'm still the same person, like same personality, same face, but the way I see life and the things I see are different still changing.

There are a lot of things that I want do in my life. I promise to continue to strive to be the best, and do my best.

Stand Up by Ludacris.

Guessing what could be going through your head.
Eventually you'll tell me.
Till then, I have only scattered nonsensical pieces of advice.

Unknown and sheltered from the horros of this world.
Please, stop looking at the horrors of yourself.


Let me help you. Let me help you see. No one knows what I'm talking about except you, dear bud. Pray to God, the only thing left to do is pray. How can He help you if you do not ask for help? Or are you too stubborn to ask, child? You have so many people around you who love you and we are listening. But you won't let us help you. How could we help you, if you can't help yourself? Keep your head up high, you're stronger than this, and this may be just a phase. I believe in you, even if you may think I don't...
Wwhap the o witt wa.

11 Ways That I Can Relax.

1. Watching Friends.
2. Getting a pedicure.
3. Solving Sudoku.
4. Playing intense clasical music.
5. Running.
6. Talking to a friend.
7. Screaming nonsense.
8. Making faces and weird motions.
9. Reading a book.
10. Writing it all out.
11. Sitting in a tree looking out at a view.

I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready. -Spongebob Squarepants.

Things in store for Year 10-11:

-1st Jazz Band Concert where I can perform all the songs.
-KM Tech Academy Student.
-Key Club Member.
-National Honors Society Member.
-Sophomore Secretary.
-Filipino Club President.
-Auditions for the next KM play.
-Gymnastics Season.
-Track Season.
-Junior Year elections.
-That 4.0 I've been trying for.
-Future things to think of.

Thank you God, for everything. Thank you. If it wasn't for you... Where would I be? Since I was baptized and forgiven, I've prayed every night since and never have I forgotten to pray at night. My family have started "family prayers", I love it.
With my family and friends support, they have encouraged me in everything I do. Even when I thought of giving up or even epic failure bwahaha. THANK YOU!

ARIGATOGOZAIMSHITA.
SALAMAT PO.
THANK YOU.

Freeze, shift, and turn.

_1_

Her heart was beating and wished that he would turn around, but he wasn't going to unless she did something. Heart racing, "Joshua! Come here real quick!" The moment she was waiting for... At first he didn't stop walking, but when he reached his car he turned around and shouted out "What?"
She said breathlessly "Come here for a second!" She beckoned him to her area. He laughed and started walking towards her. She decided to meet him in the middle where the house and the shadow of the cherry blossom tree covered the two of them. Her mind was spinning as she reached him. "I gotta tell you something." She looked down and played with the black wrist band.
He squinted through his black rimmed glasses and sighed. "Alright, what is it?"
It was quiet for a couple of moments as she fiddled with her wrist band, and the pockets of her jeans. She took a deep breath, looked him square in the eye which startled him causing him to take a minor step back.
"I'm sorry." He looked frozen for a moment, shifted his feet a bit, and just stared at her. She held her breath for what seemed about 1 whole minute until he spoke.
"What do you mean you're sorry?" He asked tentatively.
"I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry for not being the greatest girlfriend I can be. I'm sorry for not bringing myself to talk to you because I was either shy or terrified. I'm for being so much younger than you are, and I'm also sorry for saying yes, and I'm sorry for ruining your li--"
"Whoa, stop there. Mori, I don't want to hear this. What did I tell you like a year ago? Stop saying sorry. Just stop. You didn't do anything. Just ;et's not talk about this, ok? Isn't this done?" His eyebrows squeezed together the way mad angry people do when they want to blow up their head because of frustration. "Just drop it, okay? Please... We both don't need this right now. Besides, Mori you told me yourself you don't have any feelings left, remember?" She just stood there as if frozen. She nodded her head slowly. Remembering how idiotic this was, she just had to let it go and swallow her aches and pains once again. She really ruined his life, she didn't want to ruin it anymore by causing him stress or grief.
"You're right, Kuya. Aha. Sorry, weird moment right now..." She smiled a bit to act as if she meant what she was saying. "I just was being weird. Haha, probably some weird girl period thing. Ahaha."
"It's okay. Just forget it, okay?" He smiled sending a string of tingles that soared throughout her body. But she ignored them. "I'll hopefully see you at church on Thursday. See you later." He squeezed her shoulder and just smiled which plucked the strings of her aching heart. Then he turned. Turned and started walking off. She stands still as he almost reaches his car.
As she realizes what is happening unthinkably she runs. She reaches him and holds onto his wrist and as skin touches he freezes. He doesn't turn around, she doesn't say anything. Minutes of silence pass. Standing behind him, grasping his wrist, she leans forward whispers "Your personality and smile brighten my dim universe. In this one life, I can not find myself to love any other. There the sound of your voice ringing in my head, and your face pasted in my fast-pacing heart, I will never ever be able to forget you." She leans back and lets go of him. As she shifts her body the opposite direction of him, she takes a step forward and hears a slight whoosh and as she looks behind her he has turned his whole body and literally ran in front of her. His chest is heaving as if he's out of breath. She tries to read his body language or face expression. She tilts her head and makes an expression of confusion and slight discomfort. Silence fills the air around them, thundering in her ears causing her heart to speed up and her palms sticky. Thinking that he might not have a thing to stay she steps back and is about to turn when she is grabbed and pulled into a sweet embrace which human beings call a "hug".
His arms around her, a simple reflex was to do the same.
And she buried her face into his shoulders and started sobbing.

1, 2, 3, 4
Plain White T's
One, two
One, two, three, four

Give me more lovin' then I've ever had
Make it all better when I'm feelin' sad
Tell me that I'm special
Even when I know I'm not

Make me feel good when I hurt so bad
Barely gettin' mad
I'm so glad I found you
I love bein' around you
You make it easy
It's as easy as one, two
One, two, three, four

There's only one thing to do
Three words for you
(I love you)
I love you
There's only one way to say
Those three words
That's what I'll do
(I love you)
I love you

Give me more lovin' from the very start
Piece me back together when I fall apart
Tell me things
You never even tell your closest friends

Make me feel good when I hurt so bad
Best that I've had
I'm so glad I found you
I love bein' around you
You make it easy
It's as easy as one, two
One, two, three, four

There's only one thing to do
Three words for you
(I love you)
I love you
There's only one way to say
Those three words
That's what I'll do
(I love you)
I love you
(I love you)
I love you

You make it easy
It's as easy as one, two
One, two, three, four

There's only one thing to do
Three words for you
(I love you)
I love you
There's only one way to say
Those three words
That's what I'll do
(I love you)
I love you
I love you
One, two, three, four
(I love you)
I love you
(I love you)
I love you

Frailment.

Listen, I will hear you.
One glance at you pains my soul.
Loving you is a gift God has blessed me.
All is well, for I am here always at your bedside.

Initially you are old on the outside.
Now is the time for you to pass away time.
Ay nako, sa ma hall kita.
Never forget all the ones who are here for you, po .
Gracious and beautiful you are on in the inside.


I love you Lola Inang.

Day/Night

I think I'm like the owl; nocturnal. I can never sleep when night time comes. Taking naps is like a daily thing for me. 25-40 minutes minimum. At night is when my mind thinks better. It's where I feel happier, and am more energetic. Makes no sense at all. I have so much trouble sleeping. If I wake up in the middle of the night, I won't be able to go back to sleep. I feel the need to get up and do something. I'll do something like write a note to myself in the morning, or reoorganize my binder. When I wake up, I totally regret it. I wish I was more of a day person, I do love sleep though. It's just hard to go to sleep for me. Maybe I am nocturnal.